Sunday, October 14, 2001
lazy blog: from my letter to my friend who is living in an isolated mining town and is also wanting to get pregnant (it's very boring up there, so having babies is the women's only entertainment apart from alcoholism) I wrote all this off the top of my head; it's amazing how well I've "internalised" the Rules For Making Babies.
(Her:)
>As for babies, I have heard enough stories here about how hard it is
>on your body in your 30's to be absolutely convinced sooner is far
>better than later. Biologically, we really are supposed to do it in
>our 20's, just not psychologically.
(me:)
biologically we start at 18 and go on to 45. we are so lucky not to have to produce children all our lives. I can see why people became nuns or spinsters pre-pill.
re: ovulation. Um, you need to take your temperature first thing every morning and mark it on a chart. when it goes up and stays up (about 36.7 degrees or more if you're me, from a low of about 35.6) you have ovulated and it's too late. if you do it right, the change in the overall pattern is very marked. it drops again just before or in the first day or 2 of your period. this is useful for getting an idea when you ovulate, especially if you're very regular. if you write down major stresses on your chart, you can sometimes tell what has delayed ovulation.
the time between ovulation and your period is always the same; most women about 12-16 days. if you are pregnant your temperature will go up and stay up for 18 days in a row, and at that point it is almost certain. it sometimes goes up even higher than usual, like 37 degrees. this is useful for telling if you are conceiving and then miscarrying rather than just having late periods.
after three days after ovulation you have NO CHANCE of getting pregnant until about five days into your next period. I'll skip all the rest of the contraception stuff for now. it's very effective, though.
ovulation signs: cervical fluid becomes more like eggwhite or seminal fluid (if you are lucky). this is the best stuff for sperm to live in. if you get this, the best day to have sex is the last day of this fluid. otherwise it might only change to be a bit like moisturizer.
cervix moves up into your body and opens up a bit. the only way to tell this is to check regularly and get an idea what's low and closed (infertile) and what's high and open (fertile).
some women get small cramps or breast tenderness when they ovulate. again, writing it all down daily gives you a pattern to look back on.
so when you're approaching ovulation is the best time to have sex (unless male's sperm count is low. then you need to save it up for the very "peak" day of ovulation or at least limit it to every 2 days or so to allow the sperm to build up).
girls are more likely if you have sex a couple of days before ovulation (but overall conception less likely, of course). boys are more likely if you have sex right on ovulation. this is because male sperm are not so hardy; female ones live longer so by the time you ovulate all the boy ones are gone. anyway, that's the theory. but if, like me, the eggwhite fluid is rare, you want to be hitting it right on the mark.
the book is really good on all this and many other things. you should order it from Amazon: Toni Weschler, "taking charge of your fertility". I can't send it to you cause I need it, at least until I get pregnant ...
oh, and my other book says you should both give up everything except macrobiotic brown rice and spring water. failing that, you MUST take folate tablets. leafy green veg isn't enough. if you can't get them there, tell me and I'll send you some like tomorrow.
also get your iron levels checked next time you find a doctor with a clean needle. mine were very low (about a point off official anaemia). I got some chelated iron (specially processed so it doesn't cause constipation, which regular tablets do) and although I still get sleepy, I've felt physically stronger every since. the second you get pregnant your iron levels go through the floor, apparently.
(Her:)
>As for babies, I have heard enough stories here about how hard it is
>on your body in your 30's to be absolutely convinced sooner is far
>better than later. Biologically, we really are supposed to do it in
>our 20's, just not psychologically.
(me:)
biologically we start at 18 and go on to 45. we are so lucky not to have to produce children all our lives. I can see why people became nuns or spinsters pre-pill.
re: ovulation. Um, you need to take your temperature first thing every morning and mark it on a chart. when it goes up and stays up (about 36.7 degrees or more if you're me, from a low of about 35.6) you have ovulated and it's too late. if you do it right, the change in the overall pattern is very marked. it drops again just before or in the first day or 2 of your period. this is useful for getting an idea when you ovulate, especially if you're very regular. if you write down major stresses on your chart, you can sometimes tell what has delayed ovulation.
the time between ovulation and your period is always the same; most women about 12-16 days. if you are pregnant your temperature will go up and stay up for 18 days in a row, and at that point it is almost certain. it sometimes goes up even higher than usual, like 37 degrees. this is useful for telling if you are conceiving and then miscarrying rather than just having late periods.
after three days after ovulation you have NO CHANCE of getting pregnant until about five days into your next period. I'll skip all the rest of the contraception stuff for now. it's very effective, though.
ovulation signs: cervical fluid becomes more like eggwhite or seminal fluid (if you are lucky). this is the best stuff for sperm to live in. if you get this, the best day to have sex is the last day of this fluid. otherwise it might only change to be a bit like moisturizer.
cervix moves up into your body and opens up a bit. the only way to tell this is to check regularly and get an idea what's low and closed (infertile) and what's high and open (fertile).
some women get small cramps or breast tenderness when they ovulate. again, writing it all down daily gives you a pattern to look back on.
so when you're approaching ovulation is the best time to have sex (unless male's sperm count is low. then you need to save it up for the very "peak" day of ovulation or at least limit it to every 2 days or so to allow the sperm to build up).
girls are more likely if you have sex a couple of days before ovulation (but overall conception less likely, of course). boys are more likely if you have sex right on ovulation. this is because male sperm are not so hardy; female ones live longer so by the time you ovulate all the boy ones are gone. anyway, that's the theory. but if, like me, the eggwhite fluid is rare, you want to be hitting it right on the mark.
the book is really good on all this and many other things. you should order it from Amazon: Toni Weschler, "taking charge of your fertility". I can't send it to you cause I need it, at least until I get pregnant ...
oh, and my other book says you should both give up everything except macrobiotic brown rice and spring water. failing that, you MUST take folate tablets. leafy green veg isn't enough. if you can't get them there, tell me and I'll send you some like tomorrow.
also get your iron levels checked next time you find a doctor with a clean needle. mine were very low (about a point off official anaemia). I got some chelated iron (specially processed so it doesn't cause constipation, which regular tablets do) and although I still get sleepy, I've felt physically stronger every since. the second you get pregnant your iron levels go through the floor, apparently.
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