Tuesday, November 13, 2007

starting to look around...putting out feelers in certain online forums and have asked a friend for contact details for a woman I hardly know who once said in my hearing that she would love to be a surrogate...had a big cry this morning about not having my little two-year-old...and of course in my imagination it would be a girl...veering between letting this go and going full-on into it...counsellor on Thursday, I wonder if that will help?

4th birthday for A was a big success: park party, no entertainers, kids running around having fun. kept him home from childcare for most of his birthday; we had brunch, did craft, he had a big afternoon sleep and then he had cake and a play at childcare while I had a swim.

he's suddenly added a dove-like rrrrr to his speech. he's getting bigger every day.

Monday, November 05, 2007

impetigo...at least this isn't cold sores. but it clearly says in these guidelines that the sores should be covered...also that the kid should be kept home...not sure if he'll be going to childcare Thursday at this rate...there was a notice up on the door of the childcare centre saying one case of this had been reported, so I guess it's that.

late. husband still interstate with parents. should be in bed.

while I was interstate I called back the counselling service at the IVF clinic. I'd left a message about coming in to talk about what's involved in surrogacy - have also made an appointment with my IVF dr - and the counselling service had called me - so when I got the woman on the phone, I said I wanted to come in and see a counsellor who was familiar with the area. and she said "it's actually illegal in Victoria". at which point I realised I was talking to someone with NO IDEA and got on my high horse with namedropping of my ivf dr, who is recommending this as the way to go, the Law Reform Commission, to which I have made a submission, the fact that I've read the legislation and it's NOT illegal...and then I more or less said I wanted to make an appointment with someone who had a clue. I hope to God that girl was a receptionist, not a counsellor. she rang back 20 mins later with some names...and in that 20 minutes I realised that my personality is such that the more I'm said "no" to, the more I will fight this. sigh. husband relationship still crap, have had no discussion of all this. and of course, have no idea who on Earth could be a surrogate for us. all my female friends have pg problems, or are simply not interested in doing it. if I did it, I would like it to be someone who is really, really keen. or who we can pay a lot so she gets something out of it. but that IS illegal here. maybe will know more after meeting counsellor next week - hope she has a clue.

and A. has probably got cold sores! he has had a small weeping sore beside his nose for about a week; over the weekend he had a temperature and really poor sleep (yes while we were at inlaws. sigh again) - bad enough for me to think "I want another baby why?". then I get him to childcare today, with the sore covered in disinfectant cream and a cut-down bandaid, and a carer casually mentions that kid X has cold sores - in fact, I see, a face covered in them. this particular kid seems to have a crush on A. - hugs him and so on. the carer sees my shock, says "oh, it's not an exclusion", meaning that the law doesn't say you have to keep a kid with coldsores home. but fuck, couldn't they at least COVER the sores on that kid so it doesn't spread? and warn the rest of us? or even just stop kid X from wiping his sores all over my kid? I'm seriously upset about it - coldsores are permanent and on the face, disfiguring. the poor little love has his Hi-5 bandaid over it but it's really yucky and sore. grrrr. seeing dr on Wednesday for confirmation, but I know there isn't much you can do once you have it - vitamins, creams etc, all just management.

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