Tuesday, July 24, 2001

oh yes, very smart spelling it "Lollita" to avoid the porn hounds.
I forgot: porn hounds can't spell either.
and they wouldn't know Nabokov if his collected works fell on their heads from 1000 metres.
now there's a thought...

intermittent blogger right now.
have decided the weekend of August 4-7 approximately looks v.good. will have heaps of sex and see what happens.
after all, it's my last chance to be a mother at 35 - 36th birthday 9 months, 2 weeks away and counting...

Tuesday, July 17, 2001

he's started reading the "better pregnancy" book. and bad news: he realised that I'd only bookmarked the bits I wanted him to read, so he skipped straight to the bits I didn't want him to see, like the stuff about avoiding caffeine.

my friend is only three weeks off having her first baby. I feel kind of sorry for her, knowing she's going to go through labor soon. then I realised that I'll have to do that too. unless I decide that anaesthetics and surgery are preferable. wow, it must be bad if a general and being cut open are better.

Thursday, July 05, 2001

Gwen Harwood's cheery take on motherhood:


She sits in the park. Her clothes are out of date.
Two children bicker and whine, tug her skirt.
A third draws aimless patterns in the dirt.
Someone she loved once passes by - too late

to feign indifference to that casual nod.
"How nice," et cetera. "Time holds great surprises."
From his neat head unquestionably rises
a small balloon... "but for the grace of God..."

They stand a while in flicking light, rehearsing
the children's name and birthdays. "It's so sweet
to hear their chatter, watch them grow and thrive,"
she says to his departing smile. Then, nursing
the youngest child, sits staring at her feet.
To the wind she says, "They have eaten me alive."


Tuesday, July 03, 2001

do you think I'm too negative about all this?
my wish list of things I'd like to do before I have a baby: go ballooning. go horseriding. eat at Flower Drum. Stay at the Mansion at Werribee Park.(those are the achievable ones) wear the blue dress I bought in New Orleans three years ago and have never worn in public (we're talking blue designer with sequins here)

go to New York again. Go to venice again. (I've only had a day there) go to Pompeii for the first time.

oh, and learn Spanish.

Am definitely going to Perth next month to see the monet and japan exhibition and the West Australian wildflowers. the boy will want me to fly him business class using up all my points. why not.

Monday, July 02, 2001

one reason this blog is anonymous is so I can bitch about other people. a couple came over for dinner Saturday - his friends, not mine - and my eyes glazed over the minute they and the 6-month-old walked in the door.
kids are great, but why do people think you actually want all the details of what they do all day with them, and the child's sleeping patterns?
yes, I know she probably has nothing else to talk about; but when it's me in that situation, with people who aren't actually close friends, I'll shut up and try to find out what's going on in the outside world. Or I'll just stay home until I'm fit to interact with adults again.

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