Sunday, December 29, 2002

 
I'd like to know how much of baby-craving is intellectual, from our knowledge of ourselves and how things work, and how much is gut instinct, the same desires as make us thirsty or hungry or sleepy.
because the more I think about it the more I see how much some men and women are willing to go through to have children. not just the physical stuff, but emotional and lifestyle wise (lifestyle's an ugly word, isn't it?)
we'll forgo things that are good/enjoyable for us, the person, in order to have a better chance of making more people. and it's not just about the potential enjoyment that children can bring. it's also a raw and inexplicable urge: make babies.


I've settled down a lot after the horrible end to my 2ww; the drugs and hormones are definitely clear of my body, and today my temperature dropped to preovulatory levels for the first time in about 23 days. which is good, because as soon as I ovulate I'll know when we can do the next transfer. quite a few women on my bulletin board are just doing back to back IVF because they don't have enough to freeze, or not good enough quality. so, providing they defrost, I know I'm lucky. I just wish it had worked.

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